Theological ~ When Suffering is Not Good

There is no question that God gives trials for long term purification and happiness. In the long run, even when our suffering is severe, the loss is always worth the growth in our relationship with the Lord.

However, I've been meditating on the ways that trials challenge short term human development. While we trust the Lord with the crosses that find us, meditating on the damage done can help us understand why prosperity is also a good thing, and why God may spare us/others from specific trials depending on what He wants us to accomplish.

I think the key is the sometimes contested wisdom, "grace builds on nature." I believe this saying is true in the sense that you wouldn't try to explain deep theology to a one-year-old. There is a sense in which our gray matter supports and enables us to think about God. There is also the sense in which we progress from concrete things to abstract things. The sacraments exist in part for this purpose: they are concrete signs of spiritual realities.

What about when nature gets thrown off, though? A child raised without a father will have a harder time thinking about the fatherhood of God. The sacrament of marriage exists for most people so that they can understand the intimacy of love that characterizes the Trinity; people who go through severe romantic heartache and relationships breakups will necessarily experience a rupture to their belief in the ultimate reality of love. Although they may not articulate it, many people go through feelings that "love is not real," and deep down this means "God is not loving."

In considering the good of marriage, there is definitely a sense in which grace builds on nature: in youth, people fall in love naturally and easily. Nature supports the spiritual good of marriage. Tragically, many people get their hearts broken in their youth, instead. Dating later in life, the same momentum is not there. It's harder to fall in love a second, third, or fourth time, when "springtime" has passed.

It's hard to accomplish things when the natural desire is lacking; trials are great at disrupting the natural desire/momentum that would ideally support and incentivize any action. While God can heal anyone's nature, sometimes He mysteriously allows us to feel the pain for a time (even very long time).

While I don't have answers on how to move forward when circumstances are what they are, thinking along these lines helps me to understand why God is selective and providential in our trials. Depending on our life purpose, not every trial is a good one. At a certain point we have to trust that the trials God gives will not incapacitate us in a way that would derail His purpose for us.

Another way of saying this, is that there is a mysterious tension between spiritual and temporal growth. Sadly, spiritual growth must sometimes (usually?) come at the cost of temporal growth, for we must be humbled to draw close to the Lord. Yet, since grace builds on nature, there is a sense in which temporal suffering can come at a spiritual cost. The economy of all of this is so mysterious and delicate, that only God knows what will be best for each person.