The presence or absence of "joy" makes all the difference. People are hungry for joy; perhaps when Jesus said we do not live by bread alone, He was thinking of our need for joy.
What is joy? A Catholic way of thinking about it might be to call it happiness baptized. In other words, it is a natural emotion that has taken on a supernatural dimension. It is no less natural of an experience for this. It is now simultaneously a natural and supernatural experience. It is heaven and earth united.
When we enjoy a delicious meal or look into the eyes of someone we love, and we do so with an awareness of God being present to us through those things, we experience joy. God's presence to us in union with the good obtained, lends our experience of that thing the flavor of definitive contentment and meaning. Perhaps this experience of communion between God, people, and nature, is a foretaste of the mysterious Biblical promise that one day God will be all in all.
To receive joy, we have to be open to the gifts God gives, and open to God Himself. Because joy has both natural and supernatural dimensions, it requires natural and supernatural formation. We must learn to desire and have positive emotional responses towards creation. Too often, it is assumed that having fun is something human beings just know how to to do; it is not. We must learn how to value and savor the good things of life; sadly, the dismissal and devaluation of the good things of life is a learned response as well. Then, our hearts must be open to God, so that He can share in those moments with us. Sin in all of its manifestations can choke up our hearts so that God is pushed to the sidelines and absent from our daily experiences.
Little kids experience joy more easily and frequently because of their innocence and natural interest in everything new around them. Their joy, however, is a joy untested. Adults are tested, naturally and supernaturally, in ways that kids are not. Sometimes it's the crosses of life: bills, work, loneliness, health problems, complicated relationships, and dreams deferred. Sometimes it's that God remains hidden to us emotionally, allowing us to mature in our faith by persevering out of raw determination. Often, it's a combination of both. This is the essence of the Biblical wisdom that God tries the ones He loves. The dark nights of the soul, undesirable as they may be, are gifts from God that prepare us for greater joy, by increasing our holiness and capacity for God.
For this reason, joy is both a gift to cultivate, and a gift to wait on the Lord for. We must do our part to cultivate delight in the world around us and to open up our hearts to God. That said, we can't skip the growing pains of life. In the Lord's Providence, it may be our time for trial and wrestling with His seeming absence and the pain of whatever we're going through. It's simply isn't God's will that we experience positive emotions all of the time, otherwise we'd never learn to live from a place of sheer will power and sacrifice. The words, "Lord, your will be done" need to be said even when we're not feeling like it, if we are to be humbled and purified of selfishness.
Joyful people are to be appreciated and admired, but joy per se is not the litmus test of holiness. Doing the will of God, is. As a child, I felt joy: I experienced good things, and God's presence. Yet, adult life demanded much greater depths of faith. As an adult, it is sometimes harder to count the good things, especially when God veils His presence and we experience St. John of the Cross's dark night of the soul, or the desolations described by Saint Ignatius.
Job was not always joyful, yet he did not sin. The Psalms and Book of Lamentations are not always joyful, yet they are in our Bible.
As with all things, joy is ultimately a gift received. We are not in ultimate control of its presence or absence in any given moment, yet we have the sobering power to resist it. As the saying goes with salvation, "you can't earn it, but you can lose it." In the same way with joy, we can not summon it or generate it of ourselves, but we can resist it.
So, when we are not feeling joyful, that's not necessarily a bad thing. We should focus on negative lifestyle choices and attitudes that could be getting in the way. Since joy has a natural component, we should ask "am I making time for things I enjoy doing? Do I make sacrifices to ensure that I have fun with the people and things I love?" Per the supernatural component, we should ask, "am I deliberately willing thoughts of ingratitude, anger, or judgement?" All we can do is try to get out of God's way, and then let Him grow our joy in accordance with His will and timing.
Understanding joy as a gift received can help us be compassionate towards those who are not joyful. We never know what they may be going through. It can also prevent us from undue pride when we are feeling great about life and the present circumstances. Lastly, it can prevent a cheesy, "life is a bowl of cherries" attitude, or simplistic ideas that holiness always translates into positive emotions. Job was not positive when all was taken from him, He was faithful. God does not ask us to feel joyful all the time, He just asks us to be faithful.
In what sense, then, did Paul write "rejoice always?" He did not mean to feel happy emotions all the time, otherwise we'd have to toss out the verses where he gets honest about the emotional pain and trials of Christian discipleship. Instead, Paul surely meant to cultivate the attitude and emotions that sustained Job in His faithfulness. So long as we are determined in our faith, there will be present a strength, joy, and peace, that only a believer in Christ can experience. It may commingle with pain, but it will persist nonetheless.
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